This is your life….

Out of the box. Yes, it was definitely “out of the box.” But so worth it. Oh, you’d like to know what I’m referring to? Right. Let’s go for it…

Sitting in a physicians’ waiting room recently, surrounded by at least 4 other folks, one of whom had a walker. The medical assistant came out and called the name of the woman who had the walker. Then-time-suddenly-slowed-down, as if watching an accident in slow motion. We collectively watched as the woman with the walker was struggling to rise from her chair. Once, twice, nope. No one, including the medical assistant or me, with my back issues, did anything to assist. Time felt absolutely frozen…

Suddenly, my latent cheerleader burst out of her closet, energetically waving pom-poms.  Well, actually, no pom-poms, but a cheerleader’s loud sing-song voice just popped out of my mouth: “Alright, you can do this! I know it! We’re with you! Yes!” and a few more supportive (and loud) chants. (I wasn’t popular enough to be a high school cheerleader, so why not now?) The woman trying to rise erupted in laughter, apparently prompting some extra ballast, made it to her feet, and grasped the walker’s handles. Such a relief!

Could I have ever imagined doing this in years past? Are you kidding? No way, especially in public. Earlier in my life, I was a “good” girl, and behaving outside the box of accepted behavior was a cause for shame. Oh, no, you don’t see me. I’d try to disappear from those judging eyes when I inadvertently found myself outside the accepted box. Do I actually know if they were judging me? No. Probably some were and some weren’t. However, my inner shame at deviating from the accepted norm was deep and painful. (You been there?)

What a way to live! Holding my emotional breath for fear of outer judgment. Of course, the counterpoint was my self-enforced restriction on breathing into my wholeness. ‘Twas a serious pox on my blossoming human-hood.

Hmmm….social acceptance or wholeness?? Wholeness or social acceptance? (Am I belaboring the point?)

Somewhere along the way, as you might have guessed from my recent cheerleader episode, I transitioned from the rictus of needed social acceptance to….well, myself. It was too painful not to express my wholeness (and much more fun to be wholly myself!)

The moral of the story? Get a life (and hopefully, it will be your own!)

Replete with a sense of humor and living into the challenges of being human. Share a dose of “This Being Human Thing” with others.