To be, or not to be… oppositional
Coldplay? What the heck is Coldplay? Such a silly, silly name, isn’t it? C’mon, Coldplay?
Whoa, a bit of serious reality testing is required. If I remember correctly, you’re a big fan of the Beatles. What kind of name is that?! Beatles? Puhlease!
With over 100 million albums sold worldwide since 1997, Coldplay is one of the best-selling rock n’ roll acts of all time. So there!
No! Really? With a name like that?
Ahem, just a reminder about that silly Beatle nomenclature….
Ok, ok, just where are we going with this conversation?
Believe it, or not, we’re adventuring through newly opened doors.
Wow, the Doors were a great band…..
No, no, not those Doors, but “doors,” like openings into new realities. Freshly opened doors leading to that band whose name you don’t like, Coldplay, and of course, Fleetwood Mac, Jimmy Buffett, Lady Gaga….
Stop! Just stop! I’m feeling terribly embarrassed by this sheer unveiling of my cultural music blindness.
Oh, ok.
Whoa, let’s just clear the deck, once and for all. It’s not only my chosen music blindness, and this is hard to say, but it’s my lifeblood of books, too. My friends all read the same wonderful, current, books, and me, “No way am I going to read that! I am NOT reading what everyone else is reading!”
Um, I’m beginning to detect a child-like tone in your refusal to participate in what everybody else is experiencing. Perhaps, some low level whining?
Oy, I’ve been caught! Oh, well. I’ve just outed my deep-seated oppositional behavior to all you good folks reading this. Oppositional as all get out. Oh, but, hey, that behavior saved my life. Well, perhaps, not my life per se, but allowed me to become - me. Hmmm… I guess that really is saving my life.
Quickie explanation on tap. Strong-willed parent to the nth degree. My road to oppositionality held that loving, but incredibly strong willed, parent at bay, so I could figure out who I was, not who the parent wanted me to be. (Wow, that is one long run-on sentence!) And it worked. Sort of….
You bet, I gave myself the space to explore my uniqueness. But I also blocked experiencing much wonderful stuff on my chosen road to saying “no.” My habitual, and life-saving “No’s,” seeped into the rest of my life. Saying no to the music, the books, the fill-in-the-blank, that everyone else around me was experiencing at the same time. I was damn well going to maintain my individuality! And I did, but at a cost.
That cost included missing many years of enjoying Fleetwood Mac, Jimmy Buffett, Linda Ronstadt and a considerable range of the popular music with which I grew up. “Nope. I won’t listen to what everybody else is listening to!” Oh, geez! And I won’t bore you with all the popular books I refused to read.
Thank heavens, the ‘a’ phenomenon finally creeped in. ‘A’ for aging. Who wants more gray hair, less elasticity in one’s muscles, and a spectrum of other “woe is me’s?” Huh?
Me! But along with those beginning threads of aging, a sense of wholeness also arrived. Acquired wholeness. Yep. My oppositional nature realized it was time for a much overdue change of residence. When last heard from, said oppositionality appeared to be traveling in a southerly direction, towards warmer climes. Hasta la vista! And me? Fleetwood Mac is calling…