Exposed!

Exposed?

Yes, exposed. How embarrassing.

Better start from the beginning. The form in which I arrived.

Apparently, uninfluenced by spiritual origins or philosophical shibboleths, I arrived in this world not wanting to kill things - bugs, snakes, assorted critters, or other humans. No judgments of other’s paths. This is my path.

And the queries I often encounter from others:

“You don’t want to step on that large cockroach running by your foot?”

“OMG, that copperhead coiled by your car! Run over it…”

“That spider is just HUGE and heading for behind your couch! Do something!”

And that’s my problem, or challenge. I don’t want to kill things. In many (most?) cases, it would be immeasurably easier if I just raised my foot and…no, no, I don’t want to picture that. I really, really don’t.

You, now, know how problematic my life can be when the most accepted eliminative action is not one I tolerate well. Geez, talk about the amount of time I’ve spent creatively looking for alternatives to what seems obvious to everybody else. What can I say? Thanks, mom. Thanks, dad. Thanks for plopping me in a gene pool of those who don’t like killing things…..

…All of which bring me to my recent, in-house, uninvited visitors.

Sitting in my living room, recently, I kept hearing a noise I couldn’t place, but it was emanating from the kitchen. Sort of a rubbing paper sound (whatever that means to you.) Finally, I made myself get up and walk into the kitchen. Sheesh! A healthy, organic rice cake was no longer on the plate where I left it. (In truth, I’d forgotten it.) Said rice cake had been moved (moved?!) across the counter and was now sitting on top of the nearby stove.

I took a really, really deep and calming breath. Mice! My rice cake was done for. Once my heart slowed its pounding, I knew what had to come next. Peppermint oil mania. A miracle intervention supplied to all google-holics who are desperate for non-killing alternatives to pest invasions. Yes, I’ve been down this road before, quite a few years ago.

Oh, wow, wondering if I still have any of my precious peppermint oil stash? Oh, yay, pack rat that I am (no pun intended), I found a small bottle pushed way back on a kitchen shelf. I knew what would come next. Given my non-killing gene pool, setting a lethal mouse trap, lickety-split, was just not an option. Instead, I built a circular barricade of paper towels, seriously imbued with peppermint oil, all around the most used food prep portion of my kitchen counter.

When I went to bed, the kitchen door was closed to protect myself from the pervasive peppermint oil smell. Worked like a charm, just as it has for the last 10 days, when I’ve needed to rebuild that little peppermint oil barrier of paper towels, every single night! (Note to self: please buy a humane, non-killing, mouse trap. Soon.)

What a week. Soon after my non-killing mouse armaments began, I heard a very loud and persistent scratching in a living room wall. Only at night. After consultation with someone whose critter experience was much broader than mine, we divined that it was probably a squirrel seeking respite from our harsh (what?!) North Carolina winter. A quick google and you won’t believe what we found. Peppermint oil is a deterrent to squirrels! You got it! My in-house stash.

This story is way, way too long, so let’s see if I can truncate my saga of creative, non-killing, options. After my knee replacement in 2023, I tripped while using my walker and poked a hole in a wall with the door knob. Yes, the wall shielding my currently, uninvited, squirrel. Through that embarrassing hole, I sprayed a veritable tornado of peppermint oil. Whoosh!

Bye, squirrel! Fled to less peppermint-y realms.

Let’s face it, my lifelong workarounds of “I want to keep it alive!” can be a hassle. No doubt about it. But, apparently, my size 9 feet have decided to trod that path. So be it.