Appearances can be deceiving
I was meandering (a more genteel description for limping) toward the grocery store exit. A young woman, walking directly in front of me, hurried to open that door for this poor ‘ol thing (AKA me.)
Oh, heavens, I might topple over!
Very thoughtful. I acceded to her door-opening generosity with a smile. Apparently, my much-resented 6th grade Southern cotillion lessons, on graciousness, paid off.
(Somewhere, my mother is saying “I told you so!” She’s entitled.)
Backtracking a bit. I’m limping through some errands because, well, my right leg appears to be experiencing a rebellious phase. On top of my recent right knee-replacement, I’m now blessed with a case of tendinitis in my right foot. I don’t mean to be dim, but if the universe is sending me a specific message regarding my ongoing lameness, I haven’t gotten it yet.
Still listening, however…
Nonetheless, I continued to (bravely) plow forward with my errands. Purchase in hand, I headed toward the exit at my next stop, Walmart. The receipts checker saw me limping toward her and said, “No need to show me your receipt, dear, you’re fine. Just go right on out.”
Oh, my, that was it for this ol’ limping lady! So well intended, but the concern by others had taken on a suffocating air for my remaining aliveness (of which there is a considerable amount.) Yeah, yeah, my personal sense of prideful autonomy was saying “Let me breathe!”
For the sake of bucking up my felt independence, I created a buffer between me and the assumption I was just going to topple right over. (I wasn’t!) In response to the Walmart receipts checker kindness in giving me an easy bye, out popped “I bet it’s my white hair and the limp, right?” followed by a smile. Couldn’t resist. Sharing this wink and nod to my physical challenge re-asserted my independence. Reasserted my independence, mainly for me, let’s be truthful. Hey, that ol’ white-haired woman is sharp and funny, even if she looks like she might tilt over! I suddenly felt reinvigorated, saucy, and still upright, to boot. So there.
The receipts checker stared at me for a long moment, then burst out laughing. And continued laughing. Me, too. A moment of shared joy and aliveness. My locomotion challenges morphed into a door-opener for laughter. A shared merriment, that’s as essential to my spirit as, of course, Diet Dr. Pepper.
Hey, universe, if you’re sending me a specific message regarding my right leg’s mobility issues, it is not yet received. In the interim, I’m relying on my sense of humor to float my boat through this patch of unknowing. Making lemonade out of these damn physical lemons allows me to take some power back. Hoping folks on the other end of my, um, lame interactions can join me in laughter.