A return to yesteryear…..

This being human person is taking the day off from writing a full column, but I invite you to enjoy one from yesteryear…..

….the pitter-patter of tiny, furry feet, wildly celebrating at night in my plentiful kitchen. I’m not celebrating with them. At all. Their teeny-tiny, dark, rice-sized, gifts left as gratitude for my kitchen’s nightly open house are NOT a welcome precursor to making my French Press coffee in the morning. The aroma of dark roasted, chocolate-infused, organic coffee beans, freshly ground? Gone to hell!

To complicate this clearly diagnosed case of kitchen rodentia invasion, I don’t kill things! I just can’t. My middle name during these challenges evolves into…let’s find a work-around. This dedicated research process usually entails an intensive bout of googling. Then……test driving outcomes of my pacifist anti-rodentia investigations, trying to ignore how much money I wasted on bizarre gizmos.